ADVENTURES IN SHOPPANG!!! (For Nancy)

Hello, Nancy.

I hope everything is just peachy keen in Germany. How is the weather? The weather here is stupid. I'ma stop boring you now and get on with the blog, 'k? 'K.

Kristin and I decided to go shopping at a late time of night last night. (I said night twice in the last sentence. That's one of my pet peeves, but I didn't know how else to express it.)

By late, I mean 7:14pm in McPherson and we wanted to shop in Salina, which YOU know is a 30 minute drive. Or maybe you didn't know. Well, anyway, you know now. The mall in Salina closes at 9, and we thought Target closed at 11, so we decided to be super cool and adventurous and just go for it.

7:14+ time for Cordy to eat and Kristin to change clothes+ driving time= sufficient time to speed shop.

We got to the mall and went to Old Navy first. Kristin found an adorable dress and I found a few "meh" items. ("Meh" is kinda like "It's cute, but I don't want to take the effort to dig my wallet out of my purse to purchase this article of clothing at this time.")

You get the idea.

Kristin and I had been discussing whether or not the Salina mall still had a Maurices or not.

I was on the side of "Yay.".
She was on the side of "Nay?".

(She'd probably tell the story differently, but I'm telling it 100% correctly, Nancy. Do not let her sway you.)

Salina mall has a Maurices! (I win.) We went in and started gazing at the plethora of dresses before our eyes. It was too much for my ADHD, let me tell you. I was all over the place like a fat kid at a cake convention. (Do they have those? They should.)

It wasn't very long before we were set upon by a helpful sales associate.

"How can I help you?"

"Oh, we're just looking."

"Ok, well if you need anything, just let me know!"

"Alright, thanks!"

It became very apparent that we were looking for dresses.

"Are you looking for dresses?" the helpful sales associate asked WAAAY too excitedly.

"Yes", I admitted in defeat. (It was painfully apparent that I was going to get help because I OBVIOUSLY can't be trusted to dress myself.) "I'm looking for an Easter dress."

"OOOOOOH! EASTER DRESSES!!!!! Have you seen our Easter dresses up front?"

"Yes. I'm looking for something a little fancier."

"WHAT ABOUT THIS ONE?!?!?!?!?!?" she asked super fanatically. "This is a SUPER cute dress!"



Nancy. The dress she was holding. I don't know where to begin.

It was adorable, yes. But it was NOT church appropriate. (As you can see by the vividly correct drawing.) Strapless, short cheetah print skirt. It was a "Going to a pwahty cluhb and lookin for trouble" dress. Not a "Go to church and praise Jesus" dress.

"Um... I think I'm looking for something more... one color?" (I honestly don't remember what my reaction was, but that would've been a nice way to let her down softly.)

I found a few, and I went to try them on.

There was a cute lace print looking one with a cute belt. But it was too big. I humoured Excited Sales Attendant and tried on a few that she had selected...they left me questioning "Did she even LOOK at my body before insisting I try this on?"

Finally, I found "The One."



I swear, Nancy. The clouds parted, the angels sang. There was weeping. It was grey, with all these fabric flowers and rhinestones... I took a couple of pictures when we got home. (They don't do it justice.)





(I'll try to take some pictures of it ON me at some point.)

After I had made my dress selection and swore to it that we shall never be parted, Salesgirl of the Year conned me into earrings, bangles, and SHOES. (I don't buy bracelets EVER and I don't just purchase shoes willy nilly, but I was still heavily intoxicated with dress love at this point.)

Here are the shoes.


Hott, right? I don't normally wear heels, but I don't normally wear dresses like that either. Katie was coming out of her comfort zone. I could seriously rule the world with those shoes, though.

Super Salesgirl Supreme was GOOOOOOOOD. When I saw the total on the cash register, I almost passed out. But I did it. I took one for the team. (What team? I have no idea.)

I rationalized it to myself this way: "It's for Jesus." and "I have a wedding in June to go to , I'll wear it there too." and "I never dress up!" and "Katie feels pretty in this".

So, the dress is justified in my mind. The 3 inch heels, earrings, bangles, and cardigan however...

Oh who cares. You only live once, right?

Kristin dragged woozy Katie out of the mall just as everyone was shutting down.

We went to Freddy's Frozen Custard and Kristin ate. (You should Facebook her and ask her about the straw they gave her with her chocolate malt. Just sayin'.)

After Kristin was properly nourished, we waltzed into Target and Kristin found TONS of cute dresses. As we were in the fitting room, I heard something over the intercom. I asked Kristin "Are they closing?" because I couldn't hear whatever the dude said exactly. It was 9:52 in the PM. If they closed at 10, it gave us 8 minutes, right?

Kristin tried everything on at lightening speed, and we exited the room. I saw a helpful (intense sarcasm) fitting foom attendant and asked (nicely, too, I might add):



To which she (it?) replied:




Nancy, the WHOLE store was pissed at us. It was like the ultimate walk of shame. (And it was only 9:57!!!) Wait, I take that back. Cute customer service desk guy was plesant. Did I mention he was cute?

I am confident I would've left with his phone number had you been with us.

That pretty much wraps up the adventure. We drove home, it was boring.

We miss you, dear Nancy!!!!!

Love,
Katie (and everyone else, but I'm the one with the blog.)