I walked into work this morning with the typical feel of a Monday morning. "Wasn't I just here?" I worked 50 hours last week (After I've been scheduled for approximately 32 hours for the last 6 months), so I'm definitely at the tired point. I'm also at the "this paycheck is gonna rock" point.
The feeling of "wasn't I just here?" is normal when you work 6 days a week.
I'm more concerned with the "wasn't I just here?" feeling I have in my life.
I feel fat, then I feel OK with myself.
I feel like being alone, then I feel that I desperately want to be understood by someone.
I feel more in love with Jesus than ever, then I feel like He's far away.
I feel beautiful, then I feel ugly.
I feel obedient, then I feel terribly rebellious.
I feel kind, then I feel like I have the blackest of souls.
Is this a normal cycle in life? Or am I just nuts? (Don't answer that.)
I just feel like I walk and walk and walk and I'm finally making progress. I'm sooo happy! I'm never going back again! Then I see the same thing I passed awhile ago. I've succeeded in making a huge circle.
I'm sure I'm not the only person who's ever felt this way, but some days I sure feel like it.
(If you're wondering why the title is Psalm 42, go read it. Psalm 42 is my homeboy.)