I came across this quote yesterday... after I had ranted.
"It's just that for so many people I know, Christianity's this matter of...it has everything to do with morals. Christianity is a religion about morals. And they will even talk about Jesus. And they will say kids need to know about Jesus so they won't smoke, drink, or dance, or go with girls who do, and all that kind of thing. And I kinda go, 'That's not why people need to know about Jesus. The only reason-- the only possible excuse for talking about Jesus is because we need a Savior."
Thank you, once again, Rich Mullins. I have a feeling we would've been good friends. I spent a whole blog entry blabbing on and on about something that you summed up in a couple of sentences.
As crummily (Word? Yes.) as yesterday started, it got much better.
The floodgates opened, and I felt lots of love from lots of people. My cousin sent me a poem that he'd read on a friend's facebook and it just floored me. It expressed everything I felt and more. (I'll have to send him a message and ask permission to share it here. It is truly incredible.)
Then, something even cooler happened.
The whole thing that set me off in the first place yesterday morning was a health issue. I haven't had health insurance for a year and basically I don't go to the doctor unless I'm dying. I had something come up the first part of November and I basically just prayed that it would go away and tried OTC stuff to treat it. It's gotten worse, and I don't have the money to go to the doctor. I was just miserable physically and emotionally. "Where's my miracle, God? I hear all these miraculous healing stories. Where's mine?" (Selfish, I know. I'm not proud of it.) I called the doctor's office and instead of asking for an appointment, I heard this come out of my mouth: "I think I have _____. Can he call me something in for that?". "You dummy. Why did you ask that?" I thought to myself. "Oh well. It's worth a shot." They said they'd call me back.
I called my Mom and asked "Um, I just called the doctor's office and asked them to call me in something. Can you pray that they'll do that so I won't have to go for a visit?"
"Honey, they don't usually do that. You're gonna have to go see them. I hate that you don't have insurance. You need a job that gives you health insura..."
"I know, Mom. But could you pray? Please?"
"Yes. I'll pray for you."
She texted me around 11:30 to see if I'd heard anything and I said no. In addition to my discouragement, I was starting to feel uncomfortable.
I finally got a call around 1:30. I took a deep breath. "Katie? This is Amy with Dr. _____ Office. We called you something in to Dillon's pharmacy..."
I didn't hear anything after that. I was speechless. I'm assuming I thanked her before I hung up. I then called the pharmacy to see if it was ready and to see how much the prescription was. It was ready and.... wait for it.....it was $4.00.
It was all I could do to hold back my tears until I made it to my car.
Yesterday was a giant bear hug. A hug that this selfish little girl really didn't deserve.
"The LORD is compassionate and merciful,
slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love.
He will not constantly accuse us,
nor remain angry forever.
He does not punish us for all our sins;
he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve.
For his unfailing love towards those who love him
is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth.
He has removed our sins as far from us
as the east is from the west.
The LORD is like a father to his children,
tender and compassionate to those who fear him.
For he knows how weak we are;
he remembers we are only dust." Psalm 103:8-14 (NLT)
P.S. Please pray for a friend of mine.